March 3, 2014
Eloheim via Veronica Torres
When you walk through your world, you are broadcasting a signal. You are telling everyone all sorts of details about you. Most people broadcast and interpret these signals unconsciously or subconsciously. As you become more conscious and aware of your inner world, you will start to recognize more and more of these broadcasts, both incoming and outgoing.
Most broadcasts are generated by habitual patterns established in childhood. This is a big contributor to the observation of “she married someone just like her dad” and why partner after partner will share similar traits. You are broadcasting the signal which says, “This is what love looks like to me. Who agrees?” When that broadcast is based in abuse or trauma, it can attract continued difficulties.
As you become more conscious, more aware of your broadcast, you can modify it to something that more accurately reflects the current version of you. A great tool for this is “I am tempted to.” Say, “I’m tempted to see this as loving because it’s how my parent ‘loved’ yet I recognize it’s an experience I no longer wish to repeat.” Then ask, “What is true now?” to discover how loving looks from the current version of you.
Knowing what YOU experience and feel as love NOW, allows you to broadcast a new signal. The habit of accepting the abuse-based version of loving will still be strong. Keep using “I am tempted to” to hold the habit at arms length and allow your new broadcast a chance to move within you and out into the world.
The old version of loving will feel “comfortable” but that’s only because it’s a familiar suffering. The new version of loving will likely feel uncertain and even disorienting. That’s the feeling of growth; it’s you releasing you from the trap of repeated pain.