Potentials and Directions

I woke up with two amazing messages in a dream this morning.  I actually was so upset in one scene, I felt like I could cry.  Two different scenes, linked somehow, one after the other.

One I was in my own apartment, living alone.   I flung open my hall closet doors, two white doors that opened out from the center, as I was showing someone around my place, and surprisingly, I had nothing in the closet.  I said, I guess I could use this space, put stuff in it now.  Turns out, I had a two bedroom apartment and for some reason wasn’t using that second bedroom either.  It was empty except for a bed.  I remarked, I guess I could spread out in here, too, use this room instead of leaving it empty.  Don’t know why I haven’t used it yet.

In the second scene, I got in a car, in the backseat no less, and quite unwillingly it felt like, to go along in a futile series of stops for someone else who wasn’t doing the thing she said she was doing.  I just remembered this person was living in the apartment above me on the top floor.  I was getting very frustrated with it all after a few stops.  We kept going places and she never did follow through with what the intended goal was.  I felt dragged all over and lied to and nothing was getting accomplished.  In fact, I was trying to explain it to someone else and all I did was feel choked up, like I wanted to just sob.

Both of these scenes are so full of meaning for me.  The first one, it seems I have unused “abilities” or untapped potentials (empty and unused spaces with closed doors) I am not seeing, ignoring, or using to their fullest.  White is also the symbol of higher energies, the soul, higher self.  These potentials sit there, just waiting for me to open the door and use them.  Now if I could figure out exactly what they were and how to do that….

The second one, well, obviously I am allowing myself to feel led around by circumstances.  I feel like I am being tugged around by a higher being (the person living over me) and I have no say in the timing and direction (backseat passenger).  I am along for the ride.  So I am feeling a bit like a victim instead of the director of my life.  Ugh.  Not a good feeling at all.  Again, I could use a clue….

Both of these scenes need to sit and percolate in me for awhile, perhaps going into meditation with them to see what else I can glean from the messages would be helpful.  The dreams I remember when I wake are always the ones I really need to pay attention to and it’s been a long time since one has made such an impact.  Obviously, I needed to hear these.  Victimhood is not my preferred state and it’s time to fling open doors and use what is available.