The things that I have wanted to say
have haunted me for years.
It seemed that I could never find a way
to tell you, about the things that troubled me
without quivering lips and facial sliding tears.
Never wanting to appear weak
I simply chose silence
never to speak of the things in my cupboard,
not even a peek, and I have wanted you
to see and accept the real me.
What a conundrum !
This woman that appears strong – when needed
is sometimes a farce, a smiling persona, you see.
When at times, I want to fall into your arms
to stop the bleeding of my gentle heart
so I go away until I can smile again and appear free to be.
One day I realized what a lie, I have told.
Either you love me as I am or not
sometimes as weak as a kitten, sometimes bold.
Tossing caution to the wind,
I told you my truth and you loved me anyway.
I was so surprised
to open a skeleton free mouth
death mask, daisies and rocks removed
from my eyes, you peered deeply
with understanding and love,
I was freely doused.
(c) Janet P. Caldwell April 28th, 2014
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