Running Towards Myself

A few years ago I was discussing my personal growth and wanting change in my life with a spiritual advisor and said I wondered if I am merely running away from something.  Their answer was no, you are running towards yourself now.

Heart.  Arrow. 

That statement alone caused a huge shift in me, allowing me to accept the desire to change, and in turn, prompting more growth.  It was like I got permission to be me.  Since then, I have changed immensely in how I feel, how I choose to react to life and people, and what I do with my own life.  I am still a work in progress, as we all are, but comparing me to me, I don’t even remember how I used to be I am so new these days.  And it only took until I was 50 to realise I could take my life in my own hands. 

Rereading decades-old letters of mine a few weeks ago, I realised I didn’t know who that person was, but boy, was she young and full of opinions and judgements!  And she certainly was not me anymore. 

I only know this, the older I get, the less I know.  And that’s okay with me.  It makes life that much more interesting to me.  And, it just means there’s so much more out there to explore! 


One response

  1. Once again, Dorothy, your post speaks to my heart. I am in the middle of that quandary: Am I running away, or running To? My heart’s desire has for years been to move to Rhode Island, but in the midst of all this t r a n s f o r m a t i o n, with nothing else progressing, the only window that opened up and didn’t shut back down right away was a chance to go to New Jersey. Which is what I’ve been wrestling with emotionally this past week. It’s nothing permanent, I can come home when I want. But you wouldn’t (er…I guess you would) believe all the fears and questions it raises, in addition to the “Am I just doing this to run away from my dead-end life, or am I running to the next signpost along the right and true path?” It’s more of a wrestle for me than normal since I’m going to be a solo woman as a volunteer helper for an older man, via a volunteer exchange website. I don’ t know if you’ve ever heard of those, but you can sign up to participate in organic farmstays, or help with gardens and housekeeping in exchange for a room and meals. So I’m at the critical point of buying the train ticket and making it “real” instead of just in my head. I’m realizing that I am going “back out in the world” but choosing not to be afraid of people–like the brave person I was when I was 23. The theme among channellers this month seems to be “safety” and I have to keep reminding myself that I have always been and will always be safe and protected, because I didn’t go through all this to end up a victim. (But I still have the scary thoughts …maybe I need to hold my head for 10 minutes! ha ha!)


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