Update

I just realised I have not shared as much here about my upcoming move to Panama as I have in other places so here it is.

I have made progress on crossing items off my list so I can leave.  I have cleared out a lot of clothing over the summer and this week I took a bunch of stuff into work and sold them on the ongoing “yard sale” table they have there.  The background check is done but I still need to get an Apostille Seal put on it to get my visa to live in Panama as a resident.  Things are moving along and we can see the vision of us living in Panama very soon.  In fact, one of us for sure is going next month to stay.  I am not far behind her.

Yes, I am now positive that this is the decision that is right for me.  Things are falling into place now that all three of us women friends and partners are in the same place with this decision.  All three of us have made the decision to go.  All three of us are leaving marriages that no longer fit who we are now.  One has an open discussion and agreement with her spouse, one has a very rocky, volatile relationship, and the other has just grown apart and has little in common anymore.  Three very different approaches, all wanting something different from what is currently present in their lives with spouses who are not moving in the same direction.

We have found a house to buy on Taboga Island.  It is beautiful and has an apartment we can rent out to help us with the mortgage.  We can also rent out a bedroom or two during the busy season.  The island is a tourist destination and the house is in beautiful condition, we were definitely led and blessed to find this place.  The owner is a widow who has agreed to sell it to us at an extremely reduced price (down 150k from her highest, appraised price) because she wants us to have it.  She does not want to live in Panama, it was her husband’s dream, not hers, and she is ready to be done with the house.  She heard about us through American friends we connected with while we were there.  These friends already live on Taboga and have been of great help to us and put us together with her.  We feel this house is a jumping off place for us.  We still want a bigger place with more rooms so we can hold retreats and have many people there at once.  There is a large place with a pool for sale on the Island that we would love to have so maybe that will work out, too!  One place for our private use and one for the public.  Awesome.

So I still have details to take care of, like my retirement accounts and all the sick and vacation time I have accumulated over the years at work, the Apostille Seal, and what the hell do I do with my cats?  I am not taking them with me, I do not believe they would transition well and I love them too much to put them through it.  They are ten and eleven now.  Don’t know what I am doing with them though.  My kids are allergic to cats unfortunately.  My granddaughter would be over the moon to have them, she adores my girls.  And I still have to have “the talk” with my husband, but I have information he does not know I have that will ease it, for me anyways.  I think after the shock wears off, he will be happier.  Not sure how the split will go but I want it to be simple and us to remain friends in the end.  It can be done, I have seen it done, so I know it’s possible.  I have no ill will at all, it’s just time to be doing something else, for both of us.  Otherwise, I will be a walking zombie if I stay here.

So, that’s where I am right now.  I feel settled into my decision and no longer feel like I need to apologise for wanting what I want.  I am heading to year round warm weather, beaches and a definite lack of strict schedules.

Advertisements

6 responses

  1. My ex and I are friends and care deeply for one another. I had an affair while still married and he discovered it after I moved out. His feelings towards me were dicey in the beginning but it’s been over 14 years that we’re divorced and we actually live across a field from one another. I am remarried, he has a live in girlfriend and we all get along. The kids are better for it and I know that even though I could never live with him again, he will always be in my life. He even told me not too long ago that I was the only person he could really trust! So there you go… 🙂

    Like

I'd love to hear from you!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s