On the last day of the Retreat, even though I had gone to bed very late the night before, I woke up early, got ready and packed before breakfast. We had to have our rooms cleared out before ten so they could clean and get ready for the next group coming in.
After breakfast, I put on my bathing suit for one last dip in the hot tub, dragged my suitcase down the hill to the patio and soaked a bit in the hot tub then put everything in the car before the final channeling. And it turns out I had to have my session with the body worker cancelled due to location issues and the new group coming in. Darn darn darn, why did I wait so long to sign up! After listening to everyone else’s wonderful sessions with him, I was looking forward to my very own after finally getting my courage up to even ask for one. Ah well, next year.
The final channeling was, as usual, potent. This time the Council members went in order of the Chakras they resonate with, beginning with the root chakra.
The Guardians (the first chakra) opened with more energetic clearing to Julian’s music, which was considerably less than it was than in the opening channel. They told us to breathe into the newest version of us. They admonished us to let go of how it would be when we got back home. “This moment is the place where I do my living.” Dwelling on the past or the future does not serve us, they reminded us. “My experience of my truth is not situational. It is independent of my circumstance. And directed by my choice. My experience of my truth is constant.” They told us to be bold in our confrontation with habit, that habit is a chicken, and it doesn’t like to face transformation. What we experienced and uncovered in this place will not go away when we leave and we will continue to excavate afterwards. The Guardians closed with thanking us for allowing them the honor to witness the courageous work we did this week.
The Girls (the second chakra) came next. They spoke about our get together, about us hanging out together like at a campout, noting how we were enjoying our time together with all the laughter and tears. The Girls said they would love to live here for a year to experience it some more.
They said, let’s look at this energetic of having someone to make food for you like how it happened here at the Retreat. You eat this lovely food, chat, and take your dishes to the black tubs, drop them and go away. You go in, you see it, you take what you looks good to you, you take on an abundant amount of nourishment and let it be. You don’t sit there and feel bad because someone has to do the dishes or made the food for you. You don’t go into service mentality thinking you should do something about that. You say, “It’s not my job this week!” Life is like that. Look at life like it it’s a banquet. Appreciate what pleases you and nourishes you, and let that be your focus. There will always be evidence to the contrary. Choose where you put your focus. Don’t fixate on the other stuff. Abundance comes in many different forms. Look at life from different angles.
The Visionaries (the third chakra) spoke about our journey with uncertainty. It’s been our training field for “I’m going to float around in uncertainty for four days and see if I can get past the trigger that the survival instinct throws up that says you will not do it.” Don’t go home and go back to certainty because uncertainty is too scary. And don’t feel bad about yourself if you fell into it, or feel bad because you didn’t do something or considered something and didn’t do it because you’re scared.
It’s an uphill battle with your survival instinct. Maturing the relationship to the survival instinct is one of the hallmarks of homospiritus. You are not your survival instinct, this is not who you are. It’s a part of you but it is not in charge of you. Your survival instinct basically says, “DON’T!” So ask yourself if it’s your survival instinct pretending it’s you. Just because it’s loud doesn’t mean it’s right. It’s somewhat like an ant telling you what flight to take. On that order of magnitude. Your knee reflex doesn’t decide for you by responding with a jerk when you ask it a question and the survival instinct doesn’t either. Be the decider.
The Matriarch (the fourth chakra) remarked that it’s funny coming in the middle. Much as we are the bridge for the council members today, we feel like we are bridging you knowing the you that we know. We enjoy so much the opportunity to interact with you as much as you enjoy being with us. It’s cool for us, we get to hang out with you! You are that important to us and that awesome. Let yourself feel it. Let your awesome show.
Eloheim (the fifth chakra). “Gawd, this has been fun! We love chatting with you guys.” We love when you go, I never thought of it that way! In this way, you embody a new item on the Circle of Possibilities and it opens up your narrow viewpoint. Don’t discount even the smallest shift of awareness that you found over the last four days. The ripples will spread out. Use your Warrior nature and face your fears, your triggers and who you are. Yes, it’s true, it doesn’t change the truth of it to not be there. Face the pain that says, who I am is not okay. You say, that’s me and the world will magnetize around me. Explore it. Have a healed relationship with who you are.
Eloheim then did two sessions with two people who were unable to be present for the other days’ group sessions. The first person learned that her extrovert’s voice was not being heard and has backed up into her body, causing her pain. It has no place to go. There’s a 50th step problem going on, too. If it doesn’t look a certain way, it’s not successful to her. How can she internally embody the success that she seeks from others? The first step is good, it’s what she sees beyond that stops her. Eloheim told her the rest of the world will never give you what you want. What you are looking for is how you feel about yourself inside. Check this out in the first step. What are you looking for, what is your motive? Mine it completely before you move on to the next one.
The second person’s big thing concerned the weight that his big, strong body can hold. He was told, you take on more than serves you because you love so well and so much. What you give is from your reserve, and you are overextended. “Late for the moment” is how this songwriter described how he feels when he is overextended. Give yourself the self-care you need so you can give what you choose to give. We all got to see the “gate latch” on his face when it happened for this gentleman. We saw him “get” what Eloheim was trying to convey.
In closing, Eloheim went on to say how much they wanted to stay with us. They wanted to hang out with everyone for the next fourteen years. They called us “fiercely vulnerable.” Be fiercely vulnerable with others, with yourself, they said. You’ve done it the other way long enough, so try it the other way and see what that does. You don’t have much to lose. Other than to lose beliefs that limit you. Go forth and enjoy that.
It’s impossible for us to tell you how much we appreciate everything you have brought and all that you’ve done this week and all that you will be able to experience from this new stance. Imagine it instead.
The Warrior (the sixth chakra) continued on with the topic of being fiercely vulnerable and facing down your big thing. You faced it, courageously, they told us, and you said I will not hide from this anymore, I will look at it until it withers. Hiding from it just keeps you in the suffering. Use your truth and choose to see new perspectives. Peek-a-boo is a child’s game. You’re not children, the spiritual journey matures you so stand in discomfort, stand in uncertainty, and face it.
Fred (the seventh chakra) said to Fly with your fierceness, fly with your vulnerability. You may want to be quiet with it because you are just getting to know it, but let it fly, let it out of you. Superman…..get a cape if you need one! What have you got to lose but habits and familiar suffering. Just choose something else! Fred did a brilliant physical demonstration of the difference between the Roller Coaster and the Merry Go Round that had us all rolling on the floor laughing. They said this week has been like the Roller Coaster and we have been on the Merry Go Round for far too long. The Merry Go Round is safe and certain and familiar and boring and often full of suffering. The Roller Coaster has its ups and downs and thrills and chills, but you’re flying!
After the channel, we went to lunch and enjoyed our last meal together. Then we chatted or did our own things until the closing circle.
The closing circle, like last year, was full of tears and gratitude as the microphone was passed around. Veronica started us out by saying she was out of words, she was used up in the best way. However, her appreciation for the week was heard. She also told us she is going to go to Austria next year around June to visit with Eloheim’s many European tribe members. Each person then had their turn with the microphone and by the fourth person, I started to cry so when it got to me, I’m sure I was all red eyed. I could barely speak the more I said, but it was easier to talk than last year. One of my big things is getting smaller. Most of us had tears in our eyes as we expressed our feelings and gratitude for the people and the experience and for Veronica for facilitating it. We all had become friends and connected on such a deep level, it was difficult to think about separating and going back to our “regular” lives. LIke Eloheim and the Council, we didn’t want to say goodbye. I am so glad for the recordings because the more I go back, the more I get out of the whole experience. It was so deep and multilayered, I just didn’t get it all in one fell swoop. I now have a larger group of souls who I feel “sees” me and I see them and are my soul family. At some point after the closing circle someone finally remembered to get group photos after we had already had several people leave.
We packed the car and Hayat and Kerry and I left around 3:30 and that’s when we headed for the Redwoods an hour or so away.
After an enjoyable hike though the Redwoods, we drove south to Kerry’s house in Richmond, eating dinner along the way.
Final Day. Joy. Completion. Wisdom gained. Gratitude. Friendships deepened. Peace.