Standing By the Door

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As soon as I got to the party last night I found myself by the door, waiting to leave.

Not literally, of course. The party was outside.

Fortunately, I immediately recognized what I was doing so I stopped and paid attention to those feelings and the people at the party. Eloheim talks about this human trait of ours, that of not staying present in the moment and jumping to the end of an event or a plan instead of being exactly where we are, on the step we are on, in the moment we are in. Their analogy compares this trait to going to Disneyland and then standing by the gate all day so we don’t miss the ride home. Our minds take us beyond the moment to an imagined outcome, a preferred scenario, and we pay no attention and take no joy in the current moment. We also miss everything in between, including the fun stuff!

I lived most of my life that way.

I argued with myself last night though, as I often do. I wanted to leave about ten minutes after I got there. I stayed because I knew I was trying to jump to the end, trying to skip the present moment so I could go do something else, anything else. Parties are not my thing. So I looked around to see what I might have missed while standing by the door. Well, I had skipped right over the nice weather, the flowers and trees, the birds, the food, the fresh air, the puppy dogs wandering around the circle of smiley people, and more. And while I do prefer one-on-one chats or small social groups and this one had about 16 people present, none of whom I knew well, if at all, I pushed myself to go beyond my comfort zone to get to know some of them better and to take in my surroundings on a deeper level. I stretched a bit. And stayed present to the experience.

There was also a time when I would have beat myself up for not liking to make small talk with people I don’t know. Or negatively compared myself to other, more sociable beings. I prefer deep, meaningful discussions or laughing with friends instead of surface-type talking. I know that now and I’m good with it. I don’t see that as a bad aspect of me that I need to delete or change. I love and honor those parts of me that seek out more from interactions with others. This shift in perception gave me permission to choose the times and the people with whom I want to interact. As alcohol and small talk don’t interest me (no judgments about that either, it’s all about choices), I stayed for about an hour chatting with the folks around me, eating a bit, enjoying my time, and then made a quiet departure.

Stop waiting at the door, stay out of outcome, stay in the moment, stretch, and don’t beat myself up. Was an evening full of reminders.

Energy Update


RISE OF THE LIGHTWORKERS – This is a time where lightworkers (those who want to bring more light and love to the planet) will rise and stabilize their energy. Some of the points below are a part of that journey.

EXTREME EMOTION SET TO BECOME SUBTLE EMOTION – The extreme fear-based energies of recent months (division, loneliness, anxiety, depression, separation) are slowing down. We will now move into a period where SUBTLE rather than extreme EMOTION becomes the new level of experience for most.

RIDING THE ‘LOWER-STATE’ WAVES – Lightworkers are still going through a fast propulsion of energy clearings – dense, heavy emotional or physical states that arrive, but also LEAVE quickly and faster than before. This could look like difficult emotions, sudden tiredness, going from highly functional to suddenly becoming non-functional. These waves are part of the new ascension energies on the planet, which won’t go away, but their intensity (and specifically their presence in the heart energy field) will be less than recent months in the coming 4-6 weeks.

ARRIVAL OF HIGHER-MIND – A rise in HIGHER MIND ENERGIES at this time can mean on the shadow side, manipulation and calculated actions from some (as exemplified by some on the world-stage) or it can be felt inside yourself as an opportunity to let it go. On the higher side, the HIGHER-MIND energy can induce an elevation of identity, thought and divinely inspired action in your life. This rise is occurring for everybody. SO innovators, healers, creators and PIONEERS of new-energy and community-focused ways of being will benefit from this period of time greatly.

FORWARD MOMENTUM FOR PIONEERS – Late February and into March will see a new-energy wave of forward momentum, so making beneficial connections with others, and receiving DOWNLOADS of DIVINELY INSPIRED ACTIONS will come faster in these coming weeks, greatly supported by the HIGHER MIND energy.

LEARN TO BALANCE YOURSELF – If (and when) you are struggling, recognize that your lower states are not to be rejected or separated from in your mind. If it’s difficult for you, agree to learn to love yourself through this healing time for you and GET THE HELP YOU NEED. Ask the Universe for help with any struggles, write an intention about this and TAKE ACTION TO SUPPORT THAT through trying new and known activities that help you feel higher and more balanced.

SELF-CARE AND SELF-AWARENESS are vital in these times of high-stimulation so IDENTIFY YOUR STRESSORS and take action to limit those. It may be certain people, news headlines, types of entertainment. Trust what you need and TRUST WHAT YOU DON’T!

HOT TIP THIS MONTH: MEDITATE TO RECEIVE DIVINE INSIGHT – This is a VERY powerful period of time to meditate through. Higher consciousness energy wants to spark ideas in you and wake up parts of you that have been asleep or waiting to arrive. SO learn to meditate not just for clarity and peace of mind, but to access this new higher-mind consciousness, even if that means just taking some minutes of silence a few times a day.

Big love Everyone

You Are Not What You Do

Recently I wrote a post elsewhere about how quiet it is in my head these days. I have dumped a lot of baggage over the last ten years and that has left space in me, a space that can have me feeling a bit disconcerted and asking, now what?  There’s a sense of having no driving passion or need to do anything right now, and other than my continual pursuit of personal evolution, my days are quiet. I take care of personal needs and other things when they arise, visit with friends, and eat out, but I no longer have a list in my head of all the things I need or want to accomplish. I dream of a creative outlet, but all my old pursuits don’t call to me.

So, I asked in meditation for some clarity on this topic. I heard, Without all those old voices in your head telling you what to do or what you “should” do, it’s quiet in there. That is what feels different. In the past, those voices drowned out your own inner voice.

Sometimes I wonder what I do like to do. Who am I without those voices? I’m not sure I know anymore. I remember as a kid the simple things I liked to do that gave me pleasure and filled my days. I’m over tree climbing, making up dances, and playing in the cemetery though. 🙂  I enjoy writing and reading and always have. Beyond that….I am still processing all this. Perhaps I haven’t completely let go of societal expectations for myself. I did realize after the meditation that there was some judgement of self going on because I was not “doing” anything I deemed outwardly productive.

The message below comes at a great time for me.


You Are Enough ∞The 9th Dimensional Arcturian Council

“Greetings. We are the Arcturian Council. We are pleased to connect with all of you.

Often you wonder whether or not you are doing enough. Now, you can wonder this in any number of arenas in your life. You can wonder if you’re doing enough for your business or to get that promotion at work. And you can wonder if you’re doing enough to be a spiritual person. You can wonder if you’re doing enough to be of service to others.

All of the doing in the world cannot compensate for a feeling within yourself. Usually that feeling comes from experiences that have led you to believe that you’re not good enough, not worthy of receiving, and therefore you do. In some cases you overdo it in an attempt to compensate for the feeling within you.

And so, whatever it is that you could accomplish through action will only give you a fleeting sense of that worthiness. You will only appreciate yourself for a few moments before you give yourself another task, and then you will operate under the belief that you are only as good as your last success, or your last good deed.

There is no reason, of course, to prove yourselves to anyone, physical or non-physical, human or Deity. No one is keeping score, and your doing is never going to compensate. It’s never going to get you to where you want to go, because that’s not what doing was designed for.

We suggest that you build yourselves up energetically, that you focus on how much energy you can run through yourselves, how much love you can feel, how much appreciation you can have for what you already have accomplished. And then let your actions come from all of that energy you are accessing. Let your actions be a continuation of a feeling, rather than an attempt to overcome a feeling.

We see so many of you hoping that your actions will be enough, and we would love to see more of you enjoying the actions that you take because they are actions that you genuinely want to take. We would love to see more of you being authentic with yourselves about what it is you truly want to do. And then in the following through with the action, you will undoubtedly summon more energy, more inspiration, and more of an ability to love and appreciate yourselves just as you are.

We are the Arcturian Council, and we have enjoyed connecting with you.”

The Experiences You Want ∞

The Experiences You Want ∞The 9th Dimensional Arcturian Council

“Greetings. We are the Arcturian Council. We are pleased to connect with all of you.

Before you decide that you want to experience something, you often experience the opposite of it. You often give yourselves one experience simply to nudge yourself into a certain direction. It is possible for you to want something without having had the experience of its opposite, of course. But when you give yourself the experience of the unwanted thing, condition, relationship, and so on, it spurs you on. It ignites a flame underneath you. It makes you want what you want even more.

And what that gives you is an opportunity. It gives you an opportunity to send more of your light and more of your love to the experience you are going to have. You are the primary experience that you are always creating. You and your evolution are the end product of all of your experiences, whether wanted or unwanted.

So when you want to experience something enjoyable, it’s really about bringing your highest self to the party. You ask more of yourself when you want to create something that is more than what you’ve experienced before. You must answer your own call, and that is a very good thing.

What we see many of you doing, however, is feeling defeated before you even begin to create that which is wanted. We see you psyching yourselves out. You come up with a list of reasons why you cannot have that experience, and then you cling to that list. We want you instead to realize that all of your creations exist within you. So if you exist, then so must the experience that you want to have.

As you make the creation of the experience less about what is necessary, about what is out there that needs to happen, and you make it more about feeling inside yourself for the experience, then you line up with it. Then you are in harmony with that particular experience. You put yourselves in alignment with something that ultimately you cannot avoid.

You cannot avoid something that you’ve created, but you can bring it to yourselves in the perfect timing. And you can do so with very little effort. You can do so with a smile on your face. You can do so because every experience that you want to have already exists, and it already exists inside of you.

We are the Arcturian Council, and we have enjoyed connecting with you.”

Panama 2017

As you probably are aware, I am currently back in Panama. We are renting a new place in an area of Boquete closer to town. I love the place, it has a roomy kitchen and living area and comfy furniture (not always a given in Panama’s rentals from my experience!). Only thing that I don’t have here are the gorgeous views I had from my old place. We are on the ground floor of a condo unit and the views are blocked. I miss my sunrises, sunsets, and rainbows! Otherwise, it’s a really nice place with friendly neighbors who have already invited us to several informal gatherings. People in this country are so friendly and kind to each other. One of the things I love about Panama.

Personally, we’ve had two dinner parties and plan several more, one this coming Friday, and have done a lot of other things like take a long, bumpy drive up to the zip line to look at the view and drink coffee in their restaurant. I took one look at the zip line and went Nope!

Life is far more full here.

Still, I miss seeing my daughter and grandkids. Not that I saw a lot of them but at least I knew I could at any time. This is a conundrum I am working on while I am here. I have come to realize that my reason for being here has been completed, and now it’s time for something else. What that is hasn’t come to me yet. I do know that I will always come back to Panama because the country and the residents reside in my heart, but it won’t be to live like I once considered.

Compared to the other Januarys and Februarys I have experienced here, it has been cooler than usual. Still it’s way warmer than NY weather! The bajareque has been active, seems like more so than usual. This is the mist that blows over the mountains from the Carribean to shroud the town. You get wet but it’s not cold. And oh the rainbows…


We just finished the Flower and Coffee Festival in January where thousands of people descend on Boquete. It was crazy with all the traffic. There is only one way in and out of Boquete on a two lane road, so the line in either direction is very long during events like this. In February, we move into the Jazz Festival, which begins tomorrow. More crowds and traffic. Also, lots of music with artists from all over and food and vendors and even a parade. This is tourist season! I truly feel like a local, not a tourist, but I’m sure locals would qualify me as a tourist since I don’t have residency. I watch the newbies, tourists from all over the world, look around in fascination, just like I did upon arrival. I smile and offer my help if they act like they are seeking it.

I even managed to get burned on my face while sitting outside chatting during the first week at the condo because I forgot to put on my sunscreen! Been in NY in the cold and snow and hiding indoors, you see. I blistered and peeled. Not very stylish to walk around looking like Rudolph. 🙂

There. All caught up. Life is good.

Big hugs and blessings.

We Are The Light

“The lamps are different, but the Light is the same.” ~ Rumi

One Light. One Breath. One Source. One Humanity.

One People. One Heart. One Love.

Let us draw upon the strength, wisdom, and divinity of Source to bring “more love, not less” into all of our interactions in life.

“We are not looking for a light at the end of the tunnel. We are remembering that we are the light within the tunnel.”

~Matt Kahn

Reviewing Your 5D Global Actions

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Channeled by Brenda Hoffman for

Summary of Brenda’s January 27, 2017, channeled 15-minute “Creation Energies” show at   You’re learning to be an observer instead of a participant observer. Perhaps you’re gleeful about certain politicians or the world as it is now. Or angry because of the same events. Both feelings indicate something in your background you have not yet addressed. For an observer relishes the joy experienced by being with others, but does not feel the need to participate in the rage or glee so many are now expressing. Your beacon shines brightly when you’re in joy, but dims when you are in rage or glee about being better than.

“Celebrate Your New Segments” is the title of this week’s “Brenda’s Blog” – her weekly, channeled blog for

Brenda’s “Creation Energies” show and “Brenda’s Blog” contain different channeled information.

Dear Ones,

How can you observe…

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